Monday, April 9, 2012
Craziness! my last post was very depressing...uhg november comp, I don't even want to think about it. Howeverrr dance has so much more to offer then what competition gives me. So outside of competing with Trey,I still take my ballet class and enjoy my abilities to perform. I have competed since then but honestly this year has been preeetty disappointing for us, because we expected so much more! T and I auditioned and were accepted to the next phase of auditioning for a show that could prove to be so exciting, or a dead end. I have accepted this fact. I feel like I have so much experience now, on NOT getting what I want. If you know me you know this is so frustrating..(and humbling sure) but I like being fully confident in my ability!!~ So anyway when it comes to dance I have trained myself to be intrigued by my possibilities and not bound by them. I explained my feelings about this to Trey like this : an exciting opportunity is like an adorable furry kitten, all you want to do is hold it tight, squeeze too tight however...and that kitten is no longer...You have to be gentle with your dreams and guard them close so you can protect them, not too close though, because if they want to slip away, I believe there will always be other intriguing opportunities. (Like have you ever seen only ONE adorable kitten? no there are a million bazillion...) So, in that case I don't worry, I just know that preparing is the key, and believing in yourself ( my wants, even if it means believing I am the center of the world) are important, but not necessarily crucial, to getting what i want.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
There are a bunch of justifications I keep making to myself to make myself feel better about last week, I have cried I have yelled. I have slept, and drank. I am still angry and sad. I am happy for the winners because they are my friends but I am sad for me because even second place is losing. It is startling that so much passion can be snuffed out by having a win slip through my fingers. I am not a loser like I am not a morning person, I tolerate it but everyone suffers. The most frustrating is that I had so much more I could give, but i couldnt translate it. So I take second place and lose. I don't want to dance or put my shoes on, I don't even want to look in the mirror or work out. I hear music and it is like tasting sand, so aggravating I just want to get rid of it. Teaching which is my joy is just another job. This happens smetimes and I have to fight through everything to keep working so I can get things done. Hard thing is is that it will never be done, this sport, my life, this is madness.
Friday, August 5, 2011
So after our tour Trey and I got home mid July knowing we would have the rest of July and all of august to take advantage of no competitions and a lot of free time so this is what I have been up to besides teaching lessons and relaxing. Since the air in Utah is so thin we have a lot of advantage to build stamina and endurance. We go one day in the studio where we do three rounds Semely style which is Rumba rumba rumba, cha cha cha cha cha cha, samba samba samba, paso paso paso, and jive jive jive.... Usually with a few minutes to breath before we begin the next round of a different dance. Then we will spend 40 minutes working on our details and addressing anything that felt off in our rounds. Then we stretch and call it a day. The following day we will focus on other aspects that help our dancing. I go to the track and run and Trey bikes, I do yoga and Trey lifts. Besides that I make sure I always have a full bottle of water on me through out the day and that I am eating lots of vegetable and fruit. Embassy will be our first comp back and in the meantime we have lessons with Shirley Ballis and Sammy Stopford to help us look good :)